What a fucking waste of an outfit
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
