i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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