clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
