Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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