we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
We're not piercing ourselves today.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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