If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
