The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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