question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
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