Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
