sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
