Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
you never un-have a 4some
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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