Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Randomize
