Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Randomize
