Why are handjobs necessary in class?
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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