i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
