hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Is it because I queefed?
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
