1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
North Korea, Best Korea!
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
