I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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