Fine. I'll sleep in my office
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
