I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
