drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Randomize
