the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I think my nap took me to another dimension
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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