This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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