What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize