I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Terrible idea I love it
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
