guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Pooping to opera.
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