I have demons in me.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
