ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize
