these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
