Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Randomize
