He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
i will never coherently bang her
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Randomize