I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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