Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
