Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
one two three fourrrrnication!
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I wish you could order shots online.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Randomize
