WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
