dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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