did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Need sex. Gaining weight.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Randomize
