Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
