Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I lost the right to judge tonight
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
