So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I should be sponsored by Trojan
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Randomize
