The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
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