Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
accomplished twins. life is a go
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
