At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
