Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
