After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
