i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
