just survived the first fart of the relationship.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
