in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
