...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
