At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
